I don’t know if I’ve written about my aversion towards children before. Well, now you know. I walked onto the train yesterday morning and out of ALL the cars on the train I pick the one containing a sea of 10 year-olds. I’m not exaggerating, there were at least 20 of them. Must have been a field trip. For some reason they felt the need to scream about everything we passed. As in, “LOOK! A GAS STATION! OHMIGOD! DUNKIN DONUTS!” I’m standing there like, where the hell did you kids come from, a third-world country? You’re on a train in Queens for goodness sake.
Anyways, I’m standing there grimacing and trying not to roll my eyes every five seconds as one of the gremlins continuously kicks me from his seat. Then I feel a little hand on my ass as one of them tries to steady himself. Hello! That’s what the poles are for. That’s about the time the jaw-clenching and teeth-grinding began. Thank God they got off at Queensboro Plaza because there is no way in hell I (or my teeth) could have lasted until Grand Central with them.
Due to my aversion for these small people, I’ve always been convinced that I am going to be the crappiest mom ever. Fortunately, I discovered this site (via stickfigurelis.com) for some much needed tips and advice. Here’s a little sneak preview:
HAHAHA you have to see the rest. I’m sitting at work cracking up and thinking if I know any other not-necessarily-children-haters-but-definitely-don’t-like-them types to send it to.
Posted by cher on Friday, February 22nd, 2008 at 5:03 pm.