I jump on the uptown 6 the other night on my way home from work. I only take it up one stop to Grand Central…if I’m feeling adventurous, I’ll walk the 10 blocks. Tonight, my feet hurt. I knew it was gonna be rough when I get underground and see 85,000 waiting for a train. Sure enough, I wait 3 trains before I can squish into one. Things are going splendidly; I’m getting to know everyone around me very well as their bodies are crushing up against me. The man behind me has his back glued to mine – I can actually feel his butt and legs molded to mine. Gross. Then, I smell it. It wafts around me and I wrinkle my nose as I look around as if to say, “Hey, it wasn’t me.” People do seem to be looking at me, though, and then I realize that the man molded to me just farted on me! His butt was literally touching me – and he farted on me!
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mta, rants | 1 Comment »

I’m walking to the subway after work last night and I hear a commotion. Of course I stop to check out the action. I turn around and an older man (though not particularly crazy looking) is banging on the doors of an MTA bus that is stopped at a red light. He’s shouting “Open this door! Open this door! I was at the stop and you didn’t pick me up!!!!” At this point almost everyone on the block has stopped to watch this scene. Hey, after a long day at the office, who wouldn’t pause to watch a little excitement?
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mta | No Comments »

 So, I saw these ads on the train yesterday morning and suppressed my urge to laugh out loud at some of them. I think they’re geared more toward locals, but anyone who’s ridden the subway a few times can appreciate them.

“Maybe the ads give tourists something to look at. So the guy in the map seat can get a break.”

*Note: I never sit in the map seat anymore because people are always hovering over you to stare at the map. I have issues with people in my personal space. (I know, personal space issues in NYC? Ha.)

“Maybe because it’s more polite to read this ad than your neighbor’s newspaper.”

“Maybe people drink Jameson because they like to share it with people. Not like that guy sitting between two seats.”

*I hate that guy! And the guy who spreads his legs so far apart I’m allowed only half a seat. An airplane ticket only gets you one seat…a swipe should allow you only one as well.

“Maybe it’s because there are nine wrong ways to swipe your card. But no wrong way  to enjoy a Jameson.”

*Haha it is kind of entertaining to see people unable to swipe their card correctly…unless you happen to be in line behind them.

food, mta | 2 Comments »