Archive for the 'mta' Category

More Subway Rants

Posted by cher on February 8th, 2008

Recently I’ve realized that people treat the subway like they’re in the privacy of their own home. They sing out loud along to their ipod as if they’re the next American Idol, when in reality they sound more like the American Idol rejects. I don’t understand why people feel the need to subject me to their tone-deafness.

Then there’s the eating. People sit down and begin to munch on food like they’ve just been seated in a restaurant. I’ve seen a variety of snacks – yogurt, apples, Popsicles. I try to be understanding like, they’ve been so busy throughout the day they haven’t had a chance to eat, or they have a medical condition that requires them to eat now. But when people pull out the Big Macs and fries and apple pies from McDonalds, I’m like, wtf you can’t wait until you get home? The most impressive (and annoying) was a guy who managed to eat soup and a sandwich (at the same time) while he stood on the train. He happened to be standing right next to me and all I could think was that his soup was inches from spilling on me.

Then there’s the sleeping. The only time I’ve come close to nodding off on the train was when I was on my way home after a night of drinking at 4 in the morning. I guess the reason the sleeping bothers me so much is because I always get stuck next to a sleeper on the train in the morning. Their heads nods to the side closer and closer to my shoulder and then jerk back up when the train comes to a stop. Sometimes the jerk up doesn’t happen and I’m stuck with someone passed out on my shoulder until I wiggle around enough that they wake up.

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I’ve written before about people choosing to perform personal activities on the subway, but I felt the need to rant a little more. I sincerely hope I never have to experience people using the train as a toilet or for their sexual needs. I can only take so much.

“I’m freakin’ out, man…”

Posted by cher on August 22nd, 2007

Ok, so let me start off by saying that I always sit in a specific area on the crosstown bus. I don’t know why, but I migrate toward the middle section where the four seats face inward. It’s that part that has the accordian flaps that seem to disconnect you from the rest of the bus when it makes a turn.

 Anyways, yesterday I sat across from this woman who was wearing a skirt and knee highs. I know, it doesn’t necessarily sound like a problem, but since her legs were on the large side, they were more like mid-calf highs. And, when she sat down, her skirt rode up a few inches, displaying her lovely beige stockings and bare knees.

Like everyone, I have a few pet peeves, and serious fashion faux pas are one of them. Unfortunately, fashion faux pas are like bad car accidents – you can’t stop staring at them. I tried to adjust my line of view, though, (my next best option was to watch a woman knitting furiously) and mentally wished her good luck on her next outfit choice. 

Today on the bus, I headed for my usual spot. I sat in the same seat as last night and who’s sitting across from me? Knee-High Lady! Tonight, for my viewing pleasure, she was wearing a black and white skirt and black fishnets that again stopped at her calves. Once I convinced myself that this wasn’t a serious case of deja vu, just a really freaky coincidence, I realized that she clearly does not own a mirror and therefore, has no idea what she looks like. 

I made myself stop looking because I was starting to get annoyed with her again. I turned my head to the left to look out the window across from me and who do I see? Knitting Lady! In the same seat! Knitting furiously again! I thought I was being punk’d. I’m pretty sure The Twilight Zone music started playing in the background.

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“You are freakin’ out, MAN.”

Stand clear of the closing doors…please!

Posted by cher on August 20th, 2007

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The 6 train plays a recording of a woman asking us to “stand clear of the closing doors.” She ends her message with an emphasized, pleading “please!” It’s kind of amusing how she says it – but even more amusing when people fail to listen to her.

People’s desperation to get on a train amazes me. You’d think it was the last train running for a week when they throw their bodies through the doors as they close. I’ve seen a woman’s face literally smashed in the doors – I thought her nose was going to be chopped off. I’ve also seen arms, bags, and even a girl’s butt get trapped between the doors. I usually just watch from the platform, shaking my head as I wait for the train that’s directly behind the one people are almost killing themselves to get on.

 I did, on one occasion, thrust my bag in-between closing doors (with success, I might add), but kept all of my appendages out.

It’s stories like this, though, that make me wonder what price people are willing to pay for their stupidity.